A cussin' marvel.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

A film with characters whose relatability is perpetually shifting as you age. Absolute perfection.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

First Wes Anderson I saw upon its actual release, and to me it felt a lot like the crew of the Belafonte aboard the Jacqueline Deep Search submarine seeing the jaguar shark for the first time. Something beautiful and unique that I had been waiting for in a way by familiarizing myself with his earlier work (Anderson's, not the shark's), existing at that time just for me. It will always hold a special place in my heart for that, and though I recognize some of its faults, this fact will always blind me to them. In a way it helps keep the mystique alive for me, that it's typically considered second-tier Anderson, as it allows me to stay submerged, just a member of Team Zissou, watching the great beast swim past.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

A little conflicted on this one because it has the hyper-realistic blend of setting, performance, the at times lush, at others grimy digital cinematography, the fact that I could never tell which actor was going to ultimately be a cop or a criminal (or both) when first introduced. On the other hand, it has the most unrealistic thing I've ever seen in a movie: a Marlins fan, in Miami, in 2006, wanting to watch “highlights.”

Reviewed on Thursday, April 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Okay who is responsible for making the decision to not make every movie look like this? I need answers now.

Reviewed on Monday, April 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

I guess that snack pack is pretty good, huh? Wanna trade the rest of it for these million frequent flyer miles?

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

I am John Goodman losing his damn mind with joy at the end. We all are.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

If you think back on your crew when you were a kid and think that it didn't have a Lil' Ze, you were your crew's Lil' Ze.

Reviewed on Sunday, February 27th, 2022, 12:00am.

“Weeping blood comes merely from a derangement of watching all the Bond movies, my dear Letterboxd. Nothing sinister.”

Reviewed on Sunday, February 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

If a Von Dutch hat was a movie.

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Only thing that could've made it better is “Ants Marching” during the coyote scene.

Reviewed on Monday, July 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

The best homage to the ride upon which this film is based is how they modeled the lawless pirate-filled hellhole of Tortuga after Orlando, Florida.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Disney dipping their toes in the water (no pun intended) of tentacle porn.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Audiard says all that needs to be said about prison reshaping Malik by having him open his mouth at the airport. Powerful scene and statement. I can't imagine the American version of this, because as bad as it got for Malik, he still had piping hot baguettes on the reg.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

In all the horror movies I've watched I've never felt the gripping terror that I do here when he's talking to the Columbia Record Club.

Reviewed on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

All those notes around my house telling me DON'T EAT THAT that I've been throwing away…

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

It's funny how in the actual Matrix we put the exact same amount of effort into avoiding phone calls.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 10th, 2022, 12:00am.

Zero chance Bond even came close to offering Camille a sock, much less his shoes.

Reviewed on Monday, February 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Even without a virus, the mutant river squid didn't once yell at a Wal-Mart cashier about its rights. Best subtitle summation of the film: [ALL SLURPING]

Reviewed on Monday, May 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

Tom Hollander as Lars Ulrich

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Never felt more seen than Wes Anderson showing a mid-2000s dude carrying around an iPod and iPod speaker.

Reviewed on Monday, April 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

This movie was always such a delight and somewhat formative in exposing me to more genres of foreign language films, but my favorite part on this rewatch was how the narrator's facts about each character are basically what would have been their final fact if they were contestants on Next.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Glass shatters, Maximus rides into the Colosseum on a wine cart and sprays Commodus and the Senators down before hitting them all with the Stunner.

Reviewed on Monday, March 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Subsequent rewatches will now be dedicated to looking for the one Agent Smith who had a goatee 'cause he felt like it was a great look back in the real world.

Reviewed on Friday, March 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

Me, before resuming a movie during which I passed out the night prior: “An hour in the dream machine keeps me sane.”

Reviewed on Sunday, February 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

The most 2004 film of 2005.

Reviewed on Monday, November 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

“Let's get decadent” is going to get so much play at our house before snack time.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 30th, 2021, 12:00am.

Enjoy Slurm

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

I want the alternate cut where, at the end, Philip Seymour Hoffman satisfyingly clasps the ball bead chain of a rabbit's foot to the zipper of his Jansport's smallest pocket and walks off into the sunset.

Reviewed on Monday, February 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Interior decorating in the 90s was something else.

Reviewed on Monday, October 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

Never trust youths who like golf.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Honestly, Billy, the way you died without seeing the Jets win the Super Bowl is so much better than the way the rest of the class of 2000 will die without seeing the Jets win a Super Bowl.

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

God that Coconut Pete/Eddie Money/Billy Squier tour would have been legendary.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 9th, 2021, 12:00am.

Odds are good that if you sort by Hot on /r/streetwear, you will find at least one of Napoleon's fits.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

This one has gotta be in the 95th percentile of things going right for a Carnival Cruise.

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

What even is wax?

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

Pretty similar vibes to when I say, “Hey check this song out.”

Reviewed on Sunday, October 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

I counted way less than that.

Reviewed on Friday, May 14th, 2021, 12:00am.

This is a movie in the same way the Big One is food.

Reviewed on Monday, May 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

The title and accents led me to believe this would be a good bit funnier than it was.

Reviewed on Monday, October 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Yawns in slow motion

Reviewed on Thursday, February 24th, 2022, 12:00am.

Great Pet Shop Boys needle drop!

Reviewed on Monday, March 21st, 2022, 12:00am.