Movies

Below are all of the movies I have watched and logged, along with my ratings and reviews.



Score Title Director Year Genre Review
movie
8
Elvis Baz Lurhmann 2022 Musical

If ever there was a time to go alt-history on us, this would have been it. Showing Elvis just crushing it into old age on world tours, easiest 10 I'd ever give.

Reviewed on Monday, September 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Baz Lurhmann - Elvis - Musical - 2022 - If ever there was a time to go alt-history on us, this would have been it. Showing Elvis just crushing it into old age on world tours, easiest 10 I'd ever give.
movie
8
Nope Jordan Peele 2022 Horror

Tell me you've never tried getting help in a Fry's without telling me you've never tried getting help in a Fry's.

Reviewed on Tuesday, August 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jordan Peele - Nope - Horror - 2022 - Tell me you've never tried getting help in a Fry's without telling me you've never tried getting help in a Fry's.
movie
8
Jackass Forever Jeff Tremaine 2022 Comedy

I hope this is what the aliens find.

Reviewed on Monday, August 15th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jeff Tremaine - Jackass Forever - Comedy - 2022 - I hope this is what the aliens find.
movie
9
Top Gun: Maverick Joseph Kosinski 2022 Action

Still think they had to add that scene in post where he calls it "dogfight football" because someone in editing told Tom Cruise how football works.
Reviewed on Tuesday, August 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Saw this with my dad and it almost made him like me.

Reviewed on Tuesday, June 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Joseph Kosinski - Top Gun: Maverick - Action - 2022 - Still think they had to add that scene in post where he calls it "dogfight football" because someone in editing told Tom Cruise how football works.
Reviewed on Tuesday, August 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Saw this with my dad and it almost made him like me.
movie
4
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales Joachim Rønning, Espen Sandberg 2017 Action

In which we test the tensile strength of Hans Zimmer's melody as the last thing holding this franchise together.

Reviewed on Thursday, June 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Joachim Rønning, Espen Sandberg - Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales - Action - 2017 - In which we test the tensile strength of Hans Zimmer's melody as the last thing holding this franchise together.
movie
4
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides Rob Marshall 2011 Action

A courtroom gobbling up Jack Sparrow's bullshit is hitting a little too close to home right now.

Reviewed on Wednesday, June 1st, 2022, 12:00am.

Rob Marshall - Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides - Action - 2011 - A courtroom gobbling up Jack Sparrow's bullshit is hitting a little too close to home right now.
movie
8
Everything Everywhere All at Once Daniel Scheinert, Daniel Kwan 2022 Action / Comedy

Feeling pretty vindicated that the implications of this movie mean that Stick Stickly is an inter-dimensional being of great power, as I had always assumed.

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Daniel Scheinert, Daniel Kwan - Everything Everywhere All at Once - Action / Comedy - 2022 - Feeling pretty vindicated that the implications of this movie mean that Stick Stickly is an inter-dimensional being of great power, as I had always assumed.
movie
7
RRR S. S. Rajamouli 2022 Action / Musical

When a movie has a disclaimer assuring you the dances are entirely fictional you know it's about to go hard as fuck.

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

S. S. Rajamouli - RRR - Action / Musical - 2022 - When a movie has a disclaimer assuring you the dances are entirely fictional you know it's about to go hard as fuck.
movie
1
Kazaam Paul Michael Glaser 1996 Comedy

Gonna tell my son that this kid is Luka.

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul Michael Glaser - Kazaam - Comedy - 1996 - Gonna tell my son that this kid is Luka.
movie
8
Ambulance Michael Bay 2022 Action

Forty-two dead or injured civilians in the name of a single cop - pretty safe day for the LAPD!

Reviewed on Monday, May 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Michael Bay - Ambulance - Action - 2022 - Forty-two dead or injured civilians in the name of a single cop - pretty safe day for the LAPD!
movie
9
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl Gore Verbinski 2003 Action

The best homage to the ride upon which this film is based is how they modeled the lawless pirate-filled hellhole of Tortuga after Orlando, Florida.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Gore Verbinski - Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl - Action - 2003 - The best homage to the ride upon which this film is based is how they modeled the lawless pirate-filled hellhole of Tortuga after Orlando, Florida.
movie
9
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest Gore Verbinski 2006 Action

Disney dipping their toes in the water (no pun intended) of tentacle porn.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Gore Verbinski - Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - Action - 2006 - Disney dipping their toes in the water (no pun intended) of tentacle porn.
movie
8
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End Gore Verbinski 2007 Action

Tom Hollander as Lars Ulrich

Reviewed on Sunday, May 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Gore Verbinski - Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End - Action - 2007 - Tom Hollander as Lars Ulrich
movie
6
The Big Short Adam McKay 2015 Drama / Comedy

“Funny” banking movie the Trojan Horse, Mastodon needle drop the Greeks.

Reviewed on Friday, May 27th, 2022, 12:00am.

Adam McKay - The Big Short - Drama / Comedy - 2015 - “Funny” banking movie the Trojan Horse, Mastodon needle drop the Greeks.
movie
5
SubUrbia Richard Linklater 1996 Comedy

A film that manages to truly capture the interminable quality of its characters' days and nights as well as make Steve Zahn sorta unlikeable.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 25th, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Linklater - SubUrbia - Comedy - 1996 - A film that manages to truly capture the interminable quality of its characters' days and nights as well as make Steve Zahn sorta unlikeable.
movie
8
The Northman Robert Eggers 2022 Action / Drama

Best Amon Amarth music video ever.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Robert Eggers - The Northman - Action / Drama - 2022 - Best Amon Amarth music video ever.
movie
10
Dazed and Confused Richard Linklater 1993 Comedy

Dazed and Confused : Slacker :: Enema of the State : Dude Ranch

Reviewed on Sunday, May 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Linklater - Dazed and Confused - Comedy - 1993 - Dazed and Confused : Slacker :: Enema of the State : Dude Ranch
movie
10
Before Sunrise Richard Linklater 1995 Romance

It's 2:43am, the conversation trails off and Céline stares out the window. Jesse asks, “So, do you watch ER?

Reviewed on Sunday, May 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Linklater - Before Sunrise - Romance - 1995 - It's 2:43am, the conversation trails off and Céline stares out the window. Jesse asks, “So, do you watch ER?
movie
7
Slacker Richard Linklater 1990 Comedy

You ask me to guess an item that might be in Bradford Cox's pocket, Madonna's Pap smear would be one of my top choices.

Reviewed on Saturday, May 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Linklater - Slacker - Comedy - 1990 - You ask me to guess an item that might be in Bradford Cox's pocket, Madonna's Pap smear would be one of my top choices.
movie
8
One Cut of the Dead Shinichiro Ueda 2017 Horror / Comedy

When the movie ended the words ONE CUT OF THE DEAD materialized in my bedroom. I think I'm in the movie now?

Reviewed on Friday, May 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Shinichiro Ueda - One Cut of the Dead - Horror / Comedy - 2017 - When the movie ended the words ONE CUT OF THE DEAD materialized in my bedroom. I think I'm in the movie now?
movie
9
A Prophet Jacques Audiard 2009 Drama

Audiard says all that needs to be said about prison reshaping Malik by having him open his mouth at the airport. Powerful scene and statement. I can't imagine the American version of this, because as bad as it got for Malik, he still had piping hot baguettes on the reg.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jacques Audiard - A Prophet - Drama - 2009 - Audiard says all that needs to be said about prison reshaping Malik by having him open his mouth at the airport. Powerful scene and statement. I can't imagine the American version of this, because as bad as it got for Malik, he still had piping hot baguettes on the reg.
movie
5
The Crippled Masters Law Chi 1979 Action / Martial Arts

Love a world where we'd not be judged by anything but the quality of our kung fu.

Reviewed on Saturday, May 14th, 2022, 12:00am.

Law Chi - The Crippled Masters - Action / Martial Arts - 1979 - Love a world where we'd not be judged by anything but the quality of our kung fu.
movie
7
Innerspace Joe Dante 1987 Comedy / Science Fiction

I loved when Martin Short played Sam Cooke on the Holophonor for Meg Ryan.

Reviewed on Thursday, May 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

Joe Dante - Innerspace - Comedy / Science Fiction - 1987 - I loved when Martin Short played Sam Cooke on the Holophonor for Meg Ryan.
movie
9
The Quiet Man John Ford 1952 Drama

Honestly why don't all movies build to a fistfight climax?

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

John Ford - The Quiet Man - Drama - 1952 - Honestly why don't all movies build to a fistfight climax?
movie
5
Fast Food Nation Richard Linklater 2006 Comedy / Drama

This is a movie in the same way the Big One is food.

Reviewed on Monday, May 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Linklater - Fast Food Nation - Comedy / Drama - 2006 - This is a movie in the same way the Big One is food.
movie
7
Cosmopolis David Cronenberg 2012 Drama

Finally someone has captured the feeling of being explained the blockchain.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 8th, 2022, 12:00am.

David Cronenberg - Cosmopolis - Drama - 2012 - Finally someone has captured the feeling of being explained the blockchain.
movie
8
Isle of Dogs Wes Anderson 2018 Comedy / Animation

The ultimate betrayal from a man on whom I would have previously staked my life that he was a cat person.

Reviewed on Saturday, May 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - Isle of Dogs - Comedy / Animation - 2018 - The ultimate betrayal from a man on whom I would have previously staked my life that he was a cat person.
movie
7
Straw Dogs Sam Peckinpah 1971 Drama

I didn't watch this with my wife but her voice in my head said, “That's you!” when Dustin Hoffman blasts bagpipe music to get people to leave his house.

Reviewed on Friday, May 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Sam Peckinpah - Straw Dogs - Drama - 1971 - I didn't watch this with my wife but her voice in my head said, “That's you!” when Dustin Hoffman blasts bagpipe music to get people to leave his house.
movie
6
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Tom Shadyac 1994 Comedy

Our parents were right to worry.

Reviewed on Thursday, May 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Tom Shadyac - Ace Ventura: Pet Detective - Comedy - 1994 - Our parents were right to worry.
movie
7
Hard Eight Paul Thomas Anderson 1996 Drama

A cautionary tale of what happens when you're so money and you do know it.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul Thomas Anderson - Hard Eight - Drama - 1996 - A cautionary tale of what happens when you're so money and you do know it.
movie
9
A Serious Man Joel Coen, Ethan Coen 2009 Drama / Comedy

In all the horror movies I've watched I've never felt the gripping terror that I do here when he's talking to the Columbia Record Club.

Reviewed on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Joel Coen, Ethan Coen - A Serious Man - Drama / Comedy - 2009 - In all the horror movies I've watched I've never felt the gripping terror that I do here when he's talking to the Columbia Record Club.
movie
4
How It Ends Zoe Lister-Jones, Daryl Wein 2021 Comedy / Drama

Me, snatching the graded Ronald Acuña Jr. rookie card out of my younger self's hands: “no no no no, these are yours.” Hands him a binder full of the Colorado Rockies inaugural team's cards. “We all make choices, kid.”

Reviewed on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Zoe Lister-Jones, Daryl Wein - How It Ends - Comedy / Drama - 2021 - Me, snatching the graded Ronald Acuña Jr. rookie card out of my younger self's hands: “no no no no, these are yours.” Hands him a binder full of the Colorado Rockies inaugural team's cards. “We all make choices, kid.”
movie
9
Event Horizon Paul W. S. Anderson 1997 Horror / Science Fiction

The crew has no one to blame but themselves for letting Weir creep around as long as they did; should have been straight to the brig when they saw that his design aesthetic was 'mile-long hallway rigged with explosives'.

Reviewed on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul W. S. Anderson - Event Horizon - Horror / Science Fiction - 1997 - The crew has no one to blame but themselves for letting Weir creep around as long as they did; should have been straight to the brig when they saw that his design aesthetic was 'mile-long hallway rigged with explosives'.
movie
1
Fistful of Vengeance Roel Reiné 2022 Action / Martial Arts

I realized halfway through that this is effectively season two of a Netflix show, which is funny, because had you asked me to describe it at that point, I might have said it's “like season two of a Netflix show.” It's probably my fault for watching this first, but just know that if you've ever told me that Wu Assassins is a good show, you're on notice.

Reviewed on Monday, May 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Roel Reiné - Fistful of Vengeance - Action / Martial Arts - 2022 - I realized halfway through that this is effectively season two of a Netflix show, which is funny, because had you asked me to describe it at that point, I might have said it's “like season two of a Netflix show.” It's probably my fault for watching this first, but just know that if you've ever told me that Wu Assassins is a good show, you're on notice.
movie
8
Spider-Man: No Way Home Jon Watts 2021 Action / Super Hero

This needed the J. K. Simmonses running around together and at least a Nickelback reference if not Tobey leading a singalong.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 1st, 2022, 12:00am.

Jon Watts - Spider-Man: No Way Home - Action / Super Hero - 2021 - This needed the J. K. Simmonses running around together and at least a Nickelback reference if not Tobey leading a singalong.
movie
7
Cube Vincenzo Natali 1997 Horror

Alternate ending: the final door opens upon white light that, as our eyes adjust, reveals itself as our eyes adjust to be a sunlit field with a sign in the near distance that reads, “JACKSONVILLE INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT”.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Vincenzo Natali - Cube - Horror - 1997 - Alternate ending: the final door opens upon white light that, as our eyes adjust, reveals itself as our eyes adjust to be a sunlit field with a sign in the near distance that reads, “JACKSONVILLE INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT”.
movie
8
Summer of Soul (...or, When the Revolution Could Not Be Televised) Questlove 2021 Documentary

Worth it for the footage of the 5th Dimension seeing themselves play “Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In” alone, but I think my favorite part is all the men in the audience looking on in fear as their wives/girlfriends lose interest in them with every note Stevie Wonder sings.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Questlove - Summer of Soul (...or, When the Revolution Could Not Be Televised) - Documentary - 2021 - Worth it for the footage of the 5th Dimension seeing themselves play “Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In” alone, but I think my favorite part is all the men in the audience looking on in fear as their wives/girlfriends lose interest in them with every note Stevie Wonder sings.
movie
2
Eternals Chloé Zhao 2021 Action / Super Hero

Accurate title!

Reviewed on Saturday, April 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Chloé Zhao - Eternals - Action / Super Hero - 2021 - Accurate title!
movie
7
Barcelona Whit Stillman 1994 Comedy / Drama

It's shocking to me that none of these dudes ever wore a sweater draped over their shoulders.

Reviewed on Friday, April 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Whit Stillman - Barcelona - Comedy / Drama - 1994 - It's shocking to me that none of these dudes ever wore a sweater draped over their shoulders.
movie
8
Moneyball Bennett Miller 2011 Drama

I love this movie but I also just watched a four hour baseball game with eight pitching changes and two total runs and remember it's all this dude's fault. Minus one star.

Reviewed on Thursday, April 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Bennett Miller - Moneyball - Drama - 2011 - I love this movie but I also just watched a four hour baseball game with eight pitching changes and two total runs and remember it's all this dude's fault. Minus one star.
movie
10
The Grand Budapest Hotel Wes Anderson 2014 Comedy

Some of Wes Anderson's richest characters to date, including his most truly psychopathic villain in Jopling, who throws a cat out a window and walks across snow in socks without showing the slightest discomfort, thus outdoing the literal Nazi death squad in terms of evilness. Though I guess you 'can't blame someone for their basic lack of moral fiber', can you?

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 27th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - The Grand Budapest Hotel - Comedy - 2014 - Some of Wes Anderson's richest characters to date, including his most truly psychopathic villain in Jopling, who throws a cat out a window and walks across snow in socks without showing the slightest discomfort, thus outdoing the literal Nazi death squad in terms of evilness. Though I guess you 'can't blame someone for their basic lack of moral fiber', can you?
movie
8
Chopping Mall Jim Wynorski 1986 Horror

These robots seem better-designed than what we ended up with; at least these have the decency to cut our fucking heads off after taking our jobs.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 26th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jim Wynorski - Chopping Mall - Horror - 1986 - These robots seem better-designed than what we ended up with; at least these have the decency to cut our fucking heads off after taking our jobs.
movie
9
Enter the Dragon Robert Clouse 1973 Action / Martial Arts

Putting every Bond villain in a blender and splattering the results on a martial arts canvas is exactly how I'd make a movie, too.

Reviewed on Monday, April 25th, 2022, 12:00am.

Robert Clouse - Enter the Dragon - Action / Martial Arts - 1973 - Putting every Bond villain in a blender and splattering the results on a martial arts canvas is exactly how I'd make a movie, too.
movie
8
The Tragedy of Macbeth Joel Coen 2021 Drama

Yond rug very much did tie the room togeth'r, didst t not?

Reviewed on Monday, April 25th, 2022, 12:00am.

Joel Coen - The Tragedy of Macbeth - Drama - 2021 - Yond rug very much did tie the room togeth'r, didst t not?
movie
6
The Blade Tsui Hark 1995 Action / Martial Arts

I am dizzy. But I kinda like it?

Reviewed on Sunday, April 24th, 2022, 12:00am.

Tsui Hark - The Blade - Action / Martial Arts - 1995 - I am dizzy. But I kinda like it?
movie
7
Full Contact Ringo Lam 1992 Action

Is there anything more intimidating than Chow Yun-Fat in a leather vest just staring you down while casually eating a lemon?

Reviewed on Saturday, April 23rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Ringo Lam - Full Contact - Action - 1992 - Is there anything more intimidating than Chow Yun-Fat in a leather vest just staring you down while casually eating a lemon?
movie
8
1917 Sam Mendes 2019 War

Am I the only one who kinda misses loading screens?

Reviewed on Friday, April 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Sam Mendes - 1917 - War - 2019 - Am I the only one who kinda misses loading screens?
movie
7
Sputnik Egor Abramenko 2020 Horror / Science Fiction

These Stranger Things trailers are getting elaborate.

Reviewed on Thursday, April 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Egor Abramenko - Sputnik - Horror / Science Fiction - 2020 - These Stranger Things trailers are getting elaborate.
movie
8
The People Under the Stairs Wes Craven 1991 Horror

A landlord would never do drywall repairs that quickly.

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Craven - The People Under the Stairs - Horror - 1991 - A landlord would never do drywall repairs that quickly.
movie
6
Scream Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett 2022 Horror

Always gets me when it's Ethan Hunt under the mask!

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett - Scream - Horror - 2022 - Always gets me when it's Ethan Hunt under the mask!
movie
3
The King of Staten Island Judd Apatow 2020 Comedy / Drama

Lawrence of Arabia length with Lawrence the Cable Guy quality.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 19th, 2022, 12:00am.

Judd Apatow - The King of Staten Island - Comedy / Drama - 2020 - Lawrence of Arabia length with Lawrence the Cable Guy quality.
movie
10
MacGruber Jorma Taccone 2010 Comedy

Petition to change Chekhov's gun to MacGruber's celery stalk.

Reviewed on Monday, April 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jorma Taccone - MacGruber - Comedy - 2010 - Petition to change Chekhov's gun to MacGruber's celery stalk.
movie
7
Pig Michael Sarnoski 2021 Drama / Action

In my head, the events of Babe: Pig in the City are the same story of this film, told from the pig's perspective.

Reviewed on Monday, April 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

Michael Sarnoski - Pig - Drama / Action - 2021 - In my head, the events of Babe: Pig in the City are the same story of this film, told from the pig's perspective.
movie
9
The 8 Diagram Pole Fighter Lau Kar-leung 1984 Action / Martial Arts

In a film full of astonishing athletic feats, I think I am most impressed by the mother of sixteen moving around at all.

Reviewed on Monday, April 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lau Kar-leung - The 8 Diagram Pole Fighter - Action / Martial Arts - 1984 - In a film full of astonishing athletic feats, I think I am most impressed by the mother of sixteen moving around at all.
movie
9
House Nobuhiko Obayashi 1977 Horror

A lot of y'all have never had a cat before and it shows.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 17th, 2022, 12:00am.

Nobuhiko Obayashi - House - Horror - 1977 - A lot of y'all have never had a cat before and it shows.
movie
8
Eastern Condors Sammo Hung 1987 War

Sammo: First Blood

Reviewed on Sunday, April 17th, 2022, 12:00am.

Sammo Hung - Eastern Condors - War - 1987 - Sammo: First Blood
movie
2
The Adam Project Shawn Levy 2022 Action / Science Fiction

Finally someone answers the question, 'What if The Terminator was made for a cell phone screen?'

Reviewed on Sunday, April 17th, 2022, 12:00am.

Shawn Levy - The Adam Project - Action / Science Fiction - 2022 - Finally someone answers the question, 'What if The Terminator was made for a cell phone screen?'
movie
9
Moonrise Kingdom Wes Anderson 2012 Comedy

Would have been a 10 if he didn't become a cop.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 16th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - Moonrise Kingdom - Comedy - 2012 - Would have been a 10 if he didn't become a cop.
movie
9
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest Miloš Forman 1975 Drama

The mental ward patients' reactions to their imaginary World Series was basically a toned-down version of my actual reaction to the real World Series last year.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

Miloš Forman - One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - Drama - 1975 - The mental ward patients' reactions to their imaginary World Series was basically a toned-down version of my actual reaction to the real World Series last year.
movie
10
Fantastic Mr. Fox Wes Anderson 2009 Comedy / Animation

A cussin' marvel.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - Fantastic Mr. Fox - Comedy / Animation - 2009 - A cussin' marvel.
movie
8
The Darjeeling Limited Wes Anderson 2007 Comedy

Never felt more seen than Wes Anderson showing a mid-2000s dude carrying around an iPod and iPod speaker.

Reviewed on Monday, April 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - The Darjeeling Limited - Comedy - 2007 - Never felt more seen than Wes Anderson showing a mid-2000s dude carrying around an iPod and iPod speaker.
movie
8
West Side Story Steven Spielberg 2021 Musical

Such a tragic story. So much promise wasted by not simply banding together and fighting cops instead of each other.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 10th, 2022, 12:00am.

Steven Spielberg - West Side Story - Musical - 2021 - Such a tragic story. So much promise wasted by not simply banding together and fighting cops instead of each other.
movie
7
Waiting for Guffman Christopher Guest 1996 Comedy

Would rather watch Red, White, and Blaine over In the Heights ten out of ten times.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 10th, 2022, 12:00am.

Christopher Guest - Waiting for Guffman - Comedy - 1996 - Would rather watch Red, White, and Blaine over In the Heights ten out of ten times.
movie
10
The Royal Tenenbaums Wes Anderson 2001 Comedy / Drama

A film with characters whose relatability is perpetually shifting as you age. Absolute perfection.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - The Royal Tenenbaums - Comedy / Drama - 2001 - A film with characters whose relatability is perpetually shifting as you age. Absolute perfection.
movie
10
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou Wes Anderson 2004 Comedy

First Wes Anderson I saw upon its actual release, and to me it felt a lot like the crew of the Belafonte aboard the Jacqueline Deep Search submarine seeing the jaguar shark for the first time. Something beautiful and unique that I had been waiting for in a way by familiarizing myself with his earlier work (Anderson's, not the shark's), existing at that time just for me. It will always hold a special place in my heart for that, and though I recognize some of its faults, this fact will always blind me to them. In a way it helps keep the mystique alive for me, that it's typically considered second-tier Anderson, as it allows me to stay submerged, just a member of Team Zissou, watching the great beast swim past.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou - Comedy - 2004 - First Wes Anderson I saw upon its actual release, and to me it felt a lot like the crew of the Belafonte aboard the Jacqueline Deep Search submarine seeing the jaguar shark for the first time. Something beautiful and unique that I had been waiting for in a way by familiarizing myself with his earlier work (Anderson's, not the shark's), existing at that time just for me. It will always hold a special place in my heart for that, and though I recognize some of its faults, this fact will always blind me to them. In a way it helps keep the mystique alive for me, that it's typically considered second-tier Anderson, as it allows me to stay submerged, just a member of Team Zissou, watching the great beast swim past.
movie
8
Bottle Rocket Wes Anderson 1996 Comedy

Wes Anderson's movies unfold to reveal more about themselves with each rewatch, but I wasn't quite expecting this one to have as much depth. However, when Anthony tells his little sister, “I can't go home. I'm an adult,” a throwaway line to me when I was younger revealed itself to be an apt throughline in all of his work: the longing for the past, when we maybe didn't have to have it all figured out yet in this case, when we were child prodigy tennis stars in others. Much more fully realized than I had remembered.

Reviewed on Friday, April 8th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - Bottle Rocket - Comedy - 1996 - Wes Anderson's movies unfold to reveal more about themselves with each rewatch, but I wasn't quite expecting this one to have as much depth. However, when Anthony tells his little sister, “I can't go home. I'm an adult,” a throwaway line to me when I was younger revealed itself to be an apt throughline in all of his work: the longing for the past, when we maybe didn't have to have it all figured out yet in this case, when we were child prodigy tennis stars in others. Much more fully realized than I had remembered.
movie
10
Rushmore Wes Anderson 1998 Comedy

“Couldn't we just let me float by? For old times' sake?”

Reviewed on Friday, April 8th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - Rushmore - Comedy - 1998 - “Couldn't we just let me float by? For old times' sake?”
movie
10
Miami Vice Michael Mann 2006 Action / Drama

A little conflicted on this one because it has the hyper-realistic blend of setting, performance, the at times lush, at others grimy digital cinematography, the fact that I could never tell which actor was going to ultimately be a cop or a criminal (or both) when first introduced. On the other hand, it has the most unrealistic thing I've ever seen in a movie: a Marlins fan, in Miami, in 2006, wanting to watch “highlights.”

Reviewed on Thursday, April 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Michael Mann - Miami Vice - Action / Drama - 2006 - A little conflicted on this one because it has the hyper-realistic blend of setting, performance, the at times lush, at others grimy digital cinematography, the fact that I could never tell which actor was going to ultimately be a cop or a criminal (or both) when first introduced. On the other hand, it has the most unrealistic thing I've ever seen in a movie: a Marlins fan, in Miami, in 2006, wanting to watch “highlights.”
movie
8
Samurai Rebellion Masaki Kobayashi 1967 Action / Martial Arts

Toshiro Mifune with the post-retirement hairline is a force to be reckoned with, as the Aizu clan found out.

Reviewed on Thursday, April 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Masaki Kobayashi - Samurai Rebellion - Action / Martial Arts - 1967 - Toshiro Mifune with the post-retirement hairline is a force to be reckoned with, as the Aizu clan found out.
movie
5
In the Heights Jon M. Chu 2021 Musical

First time watching, are all episodes of Glee this long?

Reviewed on Thursday, April 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jon M. Chu - In the Heights - Musical - 2021 - First time watching, are all episodes of Glee this long?
movie
9
Déjà Vu Tony Scott 2006 Drama

All those notes around my house telling me DON'T EAT THAT that I've been throwing away…

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Tony Scott - Déjà Vu - Drama - 2006 - All those notes around my house telling me DON'T EAT THAT that I've been throwing away…
movie
6
Cocktail Roger Donaldson 1988 Comedy

CBGB. Max's Kansas City. TGI Fridays. Studio 54.

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Roger Donaldson - Cocktail - Comedy - 1988 - CBGB. Max's Kansas City. TGI Fridays. Studio 54.
movie
7
House of Games David Mamet 1987 Drama

Margaret having a con explained in great detail and then still falling for one right after is exactly like how I'll never really understand Catan enough to come close to winning a game.

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

David Mamet - House of Games - Drama - 1987 - Margaret having a con explained in great detail and then still falling for one right after is exactly like how I'll never really understand Catan enough to come close to winning a game.
movie
8
Fallen Angels Wong Kar-wai 1995 Drama / Romance

The night is dark and full of weirdos.

Reviewed on Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wong Kar-wai - Fallen Angels - Drama / Romance - 1995 - The night is dark and full of weirdos.
movie
7
Kiss of the Spider Woman Héctor Babenco 1985 Drama

An ode to a byegone era where leading men could have hair like that.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Héctor Babenco - Kiss of the Spider Woman - Drama - 1985 - An ode to a byegone era where leading men could have hair like that.
movie
8
Night on Earth Jim Jarmusch 1991 Drama / Comedy

A wonderful glimpse into a time before drivers discovered conspiracy theories.

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jim Jarmusch - Night on Earth - Drama / Comedy - 1991 - A wonderful glimpse into a time before drivers discovered conspiracy theories.
movie
7
Branded to Kill Seijun Suzuki 1967 Drama

I've never identified with a training scene more than Gorô Hanada keeping a balloon in the air while saying 'Why can't I be number one?'

Reviewed on Tuesday, April 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Seijun Suzuki - Branded to Kill - Drama - 1967 - I've never identified with a training scene more than Gorô Hanada keeping a balloon in the air while saying 'Why can't I be number one?'
movie
5
Possession Andrzej Żuławski 1981 Horror

Would expect nothing less from a couple of freaks that looked at a beautiful baby boy and thought, “Bob.”

Reviewed on Monday, April 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Andrzej Żuławski - Possession - Horror - 1981 - Would expect nothing less from a couple of freaks that looked at a beautiful baby boy and thought, “Bob.”
movie
8
Crossfire Edward Dmytryk 1947 Drama

The Roberts' rules of order.

Reviewed on Monday, April 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Edward Dmytryk - Crossfire - Drama - 1947 - The Roberts' rules of order.
movie
10
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Ang Lee 2000 Action

Okay who is responsible for making the decision to not make every movie look like this? I need answers now.

Reviewed on Monday, April 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Ang Lee - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon - Action - 2000 - Okay who is responsible for making the decision to not make every movie look like this? I need answers now.
movie
8
The Worst Person in the World Joachim Trier 2021 Drama / Comedy

I didn't once hear her reference a Joe Rogan Experience episode to justify the title, but it's a very beautiful film about every person I know.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 3rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Joachim Trier - The Worst Person in the World - Drama / Comedy - 2021 - I didn't once hear her reference a Joe Rogan Experience episode to justify the title, but it's a very beautiful film about every person I know.
movie
7
West Side Story Robert Wise, Jerome Robbins 1961 Musical

Real shame we skipped this phase of expressing our racism through dance.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Robert Wise, Jerome Robbins - West Side Story - Musical - 1961 - Real shame we skipped this phase of expressing our racism through dance.
movie
6
Raya and the Last Dragon Don Hall, Carlos López Estrada 2021 Action / Animation

I always sorta suspected Awkwafina was part of the key to world peace but it's good to have this confirmation.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Don Hall, Carlos López Estrada - Raya and the Last Dragon - Action / Animation - 2021 - I always sorta suspected Awkwafina was part of the key to world peace but it's good to have this confirmation.
movie
8
Portrait of a Lady on Fire Céline Sciamma 2019 Drama

It's Brittany, bitch.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Céline Sciamma - Portrait of a Lady on Fire - Drama - 2019 - It's Brittany, bitch.
movie
9
An American in Paris Vincente Minnelli 1951 Musical

I'd like to be able to do one thing as athletically graceful as Gene Kelly did everything.

Reviewed on Friday, April 1st, 2022, 12:00am.

Vincente Minnelli - An American in Paris - Musical - 1951 - I'd like to be able to do one thing as athletically graceful as Gene Kelly did everything.
movie
8
The Last Duel Ridley Scott 2021 Drama / Action

Chapter One: Billy Ray Cyrus vs. Travis Tritt Chapter Two: Andre Agassi vs. Pete Sampras Chapter Three: Joe Dirt vs. Kid Rock

Reviewed on Friday, April 1st, 2022, 12:00am.

Ridley Scott - The Last Duel - Drama / Action - 2021 - Chapter One: Billy Ray Cyrus vs. Travis Tritt Chapter Two: Andre Agassi vs. Pete Sampras Chapter Three: Joe Dirt vs. Kid Rock
movie
4
Eddie the Eagle Dexter Fletcher 2015 Comedy / Sports

The film itself is a good metaphor for its own distribution: a made-for-tv movie with a theatrical heart.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Dexter Fletcher - Eddie the Eagle - Comedy / Sports - 2015 - The film itself is a good metaphor for its own distribution: a made-for-tv movie with a theatrical heart.
movie
8
Booksmart Olivia Wilde 2019 Comedy

Extremely relatable to my high school experience in which everyone in my class was giving up their six figure jobs to head off to an Ivy League school.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Olivia Wilde - Booksmart - Comedy - 2019 - Extremely relatable to my high school experience in which everyone in my class was giving up their six figure jobs to head off to an Ivy League school.
movie
8
Amélie Jean-Pierre Jeunet 2001 Comedy / Romance

This movie was always such a delight and somewhat formative in exposing me to more genres of foreign language films, but my favorite part on this rewatch was how the narrator's facts about each character are basically what would have been their final fact if they were contestants on Next.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Jean-Pierre Jeunet - Amélie - Comedy / Romance - 2001 - This movie was always such a delight and somewhat formative in exposing me to more genres of foreign language films, but my favorite part on this rewatch was how the narrator's facts about each character are basically what would have been their final fact if they were contestants on Next.
movie
10
Punch-Drunk Love Paul Thomas Anderson 2002 Comedy / Romance

I guess that snack pack is pretty good, huh? Wanna trade the rest of it for these million frequent flyer miles?

Reviewed on Thursday, March 31st, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul Thomas Anderson - Punch-Drunk Love - Comedy / Romance - 2002 - I guess that snack pack is pretty good, huh? Wanna trade the rest of it for these million frequent flyer miles?
movie
7
The Game David Fincher 1997 Drama

The exact same thing happened to me in the early 2000s. Only differences were they had changed their name to CRC (Columbia Record Club) and I did get a bunch of nice CDs out of the whole deal.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

David Fincher - The Game - Drama - 1997 - The exact same thing happened to me in the early 2000s. Only differences were they had changed their name to CRC (Columbia Record Club) and I did get a bunch of nice CDs out of the whole deal.
movie
8
Tampopo Juzo Itami 1985 Comedy

Shows just how much ramen ground we all truly have with one another.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Juzo Itami - Tampopo - Comedy - 1985 - Shows just how much ramen ground we all truly have with one another.
movie
8
Red Rocket Sean Baker 2021 Comedy

The words “NU METAL” appear five times in the subtitles to describe this world and the characters in it, which feels about six too few.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Sean Baker - Red Rocket - Comedy - 2021 - The words “NU METAL” appear five times in the subtitles to describe this world and the characters in it, which feels about six too few.
movie
7
Candyman Nia DaCosta 2021 Horror

Bro I think you might be allergic.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 30th, 2022, 12:00am.

Nia DaCosta - Candyman - Horror - 2021 - Bro I think you might be allergic.
movie
8
American Movie Chris Smith 1999 Documentary

Really makes you wonder what could have been. These dudes could have been unstoppable if they didn't give away that can of Surge.

Reviewed on Tuesday, March 29th, 2022, 12:00am.

Chris Smith - American Movie - Documentary - 1999 - Really makes you wonder what could have been. These dudes could have been unstoppable if they didn't give away that can of Surge.
movie
8
Gladiator Ridley Scott 2000 Horror

Glass shatters, Maximus rides into the Colosseum on a wine cart and sprays Commodus and the Senators down before hitting them all with the Stunner.

Reviewed on Monday, March 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Ridley Scott - Gladiator - Horror - 2000 - Glass shatters, Maximus rides into the Colosseum on a wine cart and sprays Commodus and the Senators down before hitting them all with the Stunner.
movie
5
The Color of Money Martin Scorsese 1986 Drama

Confirms my suspicion that not even Paul Newman can make carrying a pool stick in a velvet-lined case look cool.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 26th, 2022, 12:00am.

Martin Scorsese - The Color of Money - Drama - 1986 - Confirms my suspicion that not even Paul Newman can make carrying a pool stick in a velvet-lined case look cool.
movie
8
The French Dispatch Wes Anderson 2021 Comedy

In high school after seeing my first Wes Anderson movie: “I'm shy about my new muscles.”

Reviewed on Saturday, March 26th, 2022, 12:00am.

Wes Anderson - The French Dispatch - Comedy - 2021 - In high school after seeing my first Wes Anderson movie: “I'm shy about my new muscles.”
movie
8
Mikey and Nicky Elaine May 1976 Drama

Always keep the group chat lit, y'all.

Reviewed on Friday, March 25th, 2022, 12:00am.

Elaine May - Mikey and Nicky - Drama - 1976 - Always keep the group chat lit, y'all.
movie
9
Opera Dario Argento 1987 Horror

A shot from the point of view of a raven flying around fucking people up set to an '80s metal soundtrack is how Game Of Thrones should have ended.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 24th, 2022, 12:00am.

Dario Argento - Opera - Horror - 1987 - A shot from the point of view of a raven flying around fucking people up set to an '80s metal soundtrack is how Game Of Thrones should have ended.
movie
6
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings Destin Daniel Cretton 2021 Action / Super Hero

So the algorithm caught on to Tony Leung, martial arts, and dragons; we need to collectively mass-Google 'best movies under two hours with sick practical effects'.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Destin Daniel Cretton - Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings - Action / Super Hero - 2021 - So the algorithm caught on to Tony Leung, martial arts, and dragons; we need to collectively mass-Google 'best movies under two hours with sick practical effects'.
movie
8
Da 5 Bloods Spike Lee 2020 War

To see a generation that feels fistbumping your boys is an adequate replacement for therapy is as good a metaphor for the effects of war as any.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Spike Lee - Da 5 Bloods - War - 2020 - To see a generation that feels fistbumping your boys is an adequate replacement for therapy is as good a metaphor for the effects of war as any.
movie
8
Unstoppable Tony Scott 2010 Action

Thomas ain't got shit on me!

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Tony Scott - Unstoppable - Action - 2010 - Thomas ain't got shit on me!
movie
7
Wild at Heart David Lynch 1990 Drama

There's no place like home, with a capital O.

Reviewed on Tuesday, March 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

David Lynch - Wild at Heart - Drama - 1990 - There's no place like home, with a capital O.
movie
10
Ran Akira Kurosawa 1985 War

Showing my son this the second he starts trying to put me in a home.

Reviewed on Monday, March 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Akira Kurosawa - Ran - War - 1985 - Showing my son this the second he starts trying to put me in a home.
movie
1
Party Monster Fenton Bailey, Randy Barbato 2003 Comedy

Great Pet Shop Boys needle drop!

Reviewed on Monday, March 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Fenton Bailey, Randy Barbato - Party Monster - Comedy - 2003 - Great Pet Shop Boys needle drop!
movie
8
American Graffiti George Lucas 1973 Comedy

Thunderbirds became Accords, Mel's became Sonic, and The Beach Boys became a Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, but the kids stayed the same.

Reviewed on Monday, March 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

George Lucas - American Graffiti - Comedy - 1973 - Thunderbirds became Accords, Mel's became Sonic, and The Beach Boys became a Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, but the kids stayed the same.
movie
7
The Matrix Resurrections Lana Wachowski 2021 Action / Science Fiction

If the Leonardo DiCaprio pointing meme was a movie.

Reviewed on Sunday, March 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lana Wachowski - The Matrix Resurrections - Action / Science Fiction - 2021 - If the Leonardo DiCaprio pointing meme was a movie.
movie
8
Perfect Blue Satoshi Kon 1997 Drama / Animation

Captures an essential memory of the late '90s in which we learned about and were horrified by the Internet in a matter of hours.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 19th, 2022, 12:00am.

Satoshi Kon - Perfect Blue - Drama / Animation - 1997 - Captures an essential memory of the late '90s in which we learned about and were horrified by the Internet in a matter of hours.
movie
6
The Brave Little Toaster Jerry Rees 1987 Comedy / Animation

And to think I've been blaming my wife all these years for all the crumbs in our bed.

Reviewed on Friday, March 18th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jerry Rees - The Brave Little Toaster - Comedy / Animation - 1987 - And to think I've been blaming my wife all these years for all the crumbs in our bed.
movie
10
The Long Goodbye Robert Altman 1973 Drama

Okay but what about the cat though?

Reviewed on Thursday, March 17th, 2022, 12:00am.

Robert Altman - The Long Goodbye - Drama - 1973 - Okay but what about the cat though?
movie
10
Miller's Crossing Joel Coen, Ethan Coen 1990 Drama

? Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin' rumpus ?

Reviewed on Thursday, March 17th, 2022, 12:00am.

Joel Coen, Ethan Coen - Miller's Crossing - Drama - 1990 - ? Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin' rumpus ?
movie
9
Bullet in the Head John Woo 1990 Action

As the old adage goes, out of the frying pan and into the goddamn Vietnam War.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 16th, 2022, 12:00am.

John Woo - Bullet in the Head - Action - 1990 - As the old adage goes, out of the frying pan and into the goddamn Vietnam War.
movie
8
Deep Cover Bill Duke 1992 Drama

Really not sure this is how the law works but I don't know enough to dispute it.

Reviewed on Monday, March 14th, 2022, 12:00am.

Bill Duke - Deep Cover - Drama - 1992 - Really not sure this is how the law works but I don't know enough to dispute it.
movie
4
The Gods Must Be Crazy Jamie Uys 1980 Comedy

Silly San, that bottle isn't cursed! It's not like it's Pepsi.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jamie Uys - The Gods Must Be Crazy - Comedy - 1980 - Silly San, that bottle isn't cursed! It's not like it's Pepsi.
movie
10
Speed Racer Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski 2008 Action / Sports

I am John Goodman losing his damn mind with joy at the end. We all are.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 12th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski - Speed Racer - Action / Sports - 2008 - I am John Goodman losing his damn mind with joy at the end. We all are.
movie
10
The Iron Giant Brad Bird 1999 Comedy / Animation

An awkward and misunderstood individual learns what it means to be human while subsisting entirely on metal, otherwise known as my high school experience.

Reviewed on Friday, March 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

Brad Bird - The Iron Giant - Comedy / Animation - 1999 - An awkward and misunderstood individual learns what it means to be human while subsisting entirely on metal, otherwise known as my high school experience.
movie
8
The Matrix Revolutions Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski 2003 Action / Science Fiction

Subsequent rewatches will now be dedicated to looking for the one Agent Smith who had a goatee 'cause he felt like it was a great look back in the real world.

Reviewed on Friday, March 11th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski - The Matrix Revolutions - Action / Science Fiction - 2003 - Subsequent rewatches will now be dedicated to looking for the one Agent Smith who had a goatee 'cause he felt like it was a great look back in the real world.
movie
8
Deep End Jerzy Skolimowski 1970 Drama

A teen boy, body wracked with horniness, Can music playing through his mind as it's being actively pickled in hot dog grease, haunting the streets with a cardboard cutout of the girl he's stalking under his arm. A tale as old as time.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 10th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jerzy Skolimowski - Deep End - Drama - 1970 - A teen boy, body wracked with horniness, Can music playing through his mind as it's being actively pickled in hot dog grease, haunting the streets with a cardboard cutout of the girl he's stalking under his arm. A tale as old as time.
movie
9
The Matrix Reloaded Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski 2003 Action / Science Fiction

It's funny how in the actual Matrix we put the exact same amount of effort into avoiding phone calls.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 10th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski - The Matrix Reloaded - Action / Science Fiction - 2003 - It's funny how in the actual Matrix we put the exact same amount of effort into avoiding phone calls.
movie
9
Il Posto Ermanno Olmi 1961 Drama

The story of an inexperienced young man with the build of Timothée Chalamet shooting longing glances at a vibrant young lady across the workplace on company time, also known as my version of How I Met Your Mother.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

Ermanno Olmi - Il Posto - Drama - 1961 - The story of an inexperienced young man with the build of Timothée Chalamet shooting longing glances at a vibrant young lady across the workplace on company time, also known as my version of How I Met Your Mother.
movie
8
The Power of the Dog Jane Campion 2021 Drama

What are you doing, step-uncle?

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 9th, 2022, 12:00am.

Jane Campion - The Power of the Dog - Drama - 2021 - What are you doing, step-uncle?
movie
10
The Matrix Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski 1999 Action / Science Fiction

Wait my residual self-image looks just like Keanu Reeves too — am I the one?

Reviewed on Tuesday, March 8th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lilly Wachowski, Lana Wachowski - The Matrix - Action / Science Fiction - 1999 - Wait my residual self-image looks just like Keanu Reeves too — am I the one?
movie
10
Blow-Up Michelangelo Antonioni 1966 Drama

That ball definitely didn't make it back over the fence when he threw it.

Reviewed on Monday, March 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Michelangelo Antonioni - Blow-Up - Drama - 1966 - That ball definitely didn't make it back over the fence when he threw it.
movie
10
Total Recall Paul Verhoeven 1990 Action / Science Fiction

So funny to see how badly they predict the future in these sci fi movies. ESPN still exists? Uh huh sure. Baseball still exists? Okay now we're stretching it. ESPN showing baseball highlights? You lost me.

Reviewed on Monday, March 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul Verhoeven - Total Recall - Action / Science Fiction - 1990 - So funny to see how badly they predict the future in these sci fi movies. ESPN still exists? Uh huh sure. Baseball still exists? Okay now we're stretching it. ESPN showing baseball highlights? You lost me.
movie
7
The Slumber Party Massacre Amy Holden Jones 1982 Horror

They truly don't make 'em like this anymore. My drill can barely hold a charge.

Reviewed on Monday, March 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Amy Holden Jones - The Slumber Party Massacre - Horror - 1982 - They truly don't make 'em like this anymore. My drill can barely hold a charge.
movie
10
Mission: Impossible - Fallout Christopher McQuarrie 2018 Action

The words “three plutonium cores” are uttered before the opening credits. Easiest 10 I've ever given.

Reviewed on Monday, March 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

Christopher McQuarrie - Mission: Impossible - Fallout - Action - 2018 - The words “three plutonium cores” are uttered before the opening credits. Easiest 10 I've ever given.
movie
10
Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me David Lynch 1992 Drama

So many questions, but happy to have definitive proof that James has, in fact, never been cool.

Reviewed on Monday, March 7th, 2022, 12:00am.

David Lynch - Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me - Drama - 1992 - So many questions, but happy to have definitive proof that James has, in fact, never been cool.
movie
2
Zack Snyder's Justice League Zack Snyder 2021 Action / Super Hero

I was misled.

Reviewed on Sunday, March 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Zack Snyder - Zack Snyder's Justice League - Action / Super Hero - 2021 - I was misled.
movie
8
Color Out of Space Richard Stanley 2019 Horror

You ever been in a storm, Ward?

Reviewed on Sunday, March 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

Richard Stanley - Color Out of Space - Horror - 2019 - You ever been in a storm, Ward?
movie
10
To Live and Die in L.A. William Friedkin 1985 Action / Drama

Everybody have fun tonight Everybody hang dong tonight

Reviewed on Sunday, March 6th, 2022, 12:00am.

William Friedkin - To Live and Die in L.A. - Action / Drama - 1985 - Everybody have fun tonight Everybody hang dong tonight
movie
7
Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation Christopher McQuarrie 2015 Action

Just wanna listen to opera and make every day leg day.

Reviewed on Saturday, March 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Christopher McQuarrie - Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation - Action - 2015 - Just wanna listen to opera and make every day leg day.
movie
6
Halloween III: Season of the Witch Tommy Lee Wallace 1982 Horror

Multi-Devil Marketing

Reviewed on Saturday, March 5th, 2022, 12:00am.

Tommy Lee Wallace - Halloween III: Season of the Witch - Horror - 1982 - Multi-Devil Marketing
movie
10
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol Brad Bird 2011 Action

The strength I am displaying by not making a crack about Tom Cruise standing in front of an exploding Kremlin while wearing a Bruce Springsteen t-shirt.

Reviewed on Friday, March 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Brad Bird - Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol - Action - 2011 - The strength I am displaying by not making a crack about Tom Cruise standing in front of an exploding Kremlin while wearing a Bruce Springsteen t-shirt.
movie
10
Point Break Kathryn Bigelow 1991 Action

I usually don't complain about the realism of plots of films like this, but this one is a little too hard to believe. An Ohio State QB throws a touchdown pass after college?

Reviewed on Friday, March 4th, 2022, 12:00am.

Kathryn Bigelow - Point Break - Action - 1991 - I usually don't complain about the realism of plots of films like this, but this one is a little too hard to believe. An Ohio State QB throws a touchdown pass after college?
movie
9
Drive My Car Ryusuke Hamaguchi 2021 Drama

At three hours the only place they should've been driving that car is to Mordor.

Reviewed on Thursday, March 3rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Ryusuke Hamaguchi - Drive My Car - Drama - 2021 - At three hours the only place they should've been driving that car is to Mordor.
movie
2
The Last Temptation of Christ Martin Scorsese 1988 Drama

The way Jesus is carryin' on, you would think he had to sit through The Last Temptation of Christ.

Reviewed on Wednesday, March 2nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Martin Scorsese - The Last Temptation of Christ - Drama - 1988 - The way Jesus is carryin' on, you would think he had to sit through The Last Temptation of Christ.
movie
7
Burning Lee Chang-dong 2018 Drama

My man dresses like he's on the way to Target to buy up all the baseball cards before the kids get a chance, bangs like he is a baseball card, and then Steven Yeun comes into the picture looking like he belongs on a baseball card. Never stood a chance.

Reviewed on Tuesday, March 1st, 2022, 12:00am.

Lee Chang-dong - Burning - Drama - 2018 - My man dresses like he's on the way to Target to buy up all the baseball cards before the kids get a chance, bangs like he is a baseball card, and then Steven Yeun comes into the picture looking like he belongs on a baseball card. Never stood a chance.
movie
7
Mission: Impossible III J.J. Abrams 2006 Action

I want the alternate cut where, at the end, Philip Seymour Hoffman satisfyingly clasps the ball bead chain of a rabbit's foot to the zipper of his Jansport's smallest pocket and walks off into the sunset.

Reviewed on Monday, February 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

J.J. Abrams - Mission: Impossible III - Action - 2006 - I want the alternate cut where, at the end, Philip Seymour Hoffman satisfyingly clasps the ball bead chain of a rabbit's foot to the zipper of his Jansport's smallest pocket and walks off into the sunset.
movie
7
Nightmare Alley Guillermo Del Toro 2021 Horror

Bradley Cooper as 'the kid' at the carnival is like calling the big dude in the gang 'Tiny', but for some reason none of the characters in this film seem to think it's funny like I do.

Reviewed on Monday, February 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Guillermo Del Toro - Nightmare Alley - Horror - 2021 - Bradley Cooper as 'the kid' at the carnival is like calling the big dude in the gang 'Tiny', but for some reason none of the characters in this film seem to think it's funny like I do.
movie
8
Minari Lee Isaac Chung 2020 Drama

Not really a dumb joke to make here. Just a great reminder to sit on the floor and watch wrestling with loved ones every once in a while.

Reviewed on Monday, February 28th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lee Isaac Chung - Minari - Drama - 2020 - Not really a dumb joke to make here. Just a great reminder to sit on the floor and watch wrestling with loved ones every once in a while.
movie
6
Mank David Fincher 2020 Drama / Comedy

This is exactly my process for writing my Letterboxd reviews.

Reviewed on Sunday, February 27th, 2022, 12:00am.

David Fincher - Mank - Drama / Comedy - 2020 - This is exactly my process for writing my Letterboxd reviews.
movie
10
City of God Fernando Meirelles 2002 Drama

If you think back on your crew when you were a kid and think that it didn't have a Lil' Ze, you were your crew's Lil' Ze.

Reviewed on Sunday, February 27th, 2022, 12:00am.

Fernando Meirelles - City of God - Drama - 2002 - If you think back on your crew when you were a kid and think that it didn't have a Lil' Ze, you were your crew's Lil' Ze.
movie
7
Licorice Pizza Paul Thomas Anderson 2021 Drama / Comedy

We really should have known The Doors could be blamed for water beds.

Reviewed on Saturday, February 26th, 2022, 12:00am.

Paul Thomas Anderson - Licorice Pizza - Drama / Comedy - 2021 - We really should have known The Doors could be blamed for water beds.
movie
4
Mission: Impossible II John Woo 2000 Action

Yawns in slow motion

Reviewed on Thursday, February 24th, 2022, 12:00am.

John Woo - Mission: Impossible II - Action - 2000 - Yawns in slow motion
movie
10
Mission: Impossible Brian De Palma 1996 Action

Ethan Hunt, hiding in a broom closet waiting to strike: “I'M TAKING THE CHIN OFF IT KILLS!”

Reviewed on Wednesday, February 23rd, 2022, 12:00am.

Brian De Palma - Mission: Impossible - Action - 1996 - Ethan Hunt, hiding in a broom closet waiting to strike: “I'M TAKING THE CHIN OFF IT KILLS!”
movie
8
No Time to Die Cary Joji Fukunaga 2021 Action / James Bond

There is definitely a metaphor somewhere in Bond strolling into a place called The Poison Garden without a mask on, but I'm not quite smart enough to work out what it is.

Reviewed on Tuesday, February 22nd, 2022, 12:00am.

Cary Joji Fukunaga - No Time to Die - Action / James Bond - 2021 - There is definitely a metaphor somewhere in Bond strolling into a place called The Poison Garden without a mask on, but I'm not quite smart enough to work out what it is.
movie
9
Quantum of Solace Marc Forster 2008 Action / James Bond

Zero chance Bond even came close to offering Camille a sock, much less his shoes.

Reviewed on Monday, February 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Marc Forster - Quantum of Solace - Action / James Bond - 2008 - Zero chance Bond even came close to offering Camille a sock, much less his shoes.
movie
10
Skyfall Sam Mendes 2012 Action / James Bond

Silva must have the sickest Plex Server.

Reviewed on Monday, February 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Sam Mendes - Skyfall - Action / James Bond - 2012 - Silva must have the sickest Plex Server.
movie
7
Spectre Sam Mendes 2015 Action / James Bond

What older sibling hasn't told their little brother he or she is the author of all his pain while making him relive all the worst parts of his life?

Reviewed on Monday, February 21st, 2022, 12:00am.

Sam Mendes - Spectre - Action / James Bond - 2015 - What older sibling hasn't told their little brother he or she is the author of all his pain while making him relive all the worst parts of his life?
movie
8
Die Another Day Lee Tamahori 2002 Action / James Bond

Me, before resuming a movie during which I passed out the night prior: “An hour in the dream machine keeps me sane.”

Reviewed on Sunday, February 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Lee Tamahori - Die Another Day - Action / James Bond - 2002 - Me, before resuming a movie during which I passed out the night prior: “An hour in the dream machine keeps me sane.”
movie
10
Casino Royale Martin Campbell 2006 Action / James Bond

“Weeping blood comes merely from a derangement of watching all the Bond movies, my dear Letterboxd. Nothing sinister.”

Reviewed on Sunday, February 20th, 2022, 12:00am.

Martin Campbell - Casino Royale - Action / James Bond - 2006 - “Weeping blood comes merely from a derangement of watching all the Bond movies, my dear Letterboxd. Nothing sinister.”
movie
5
The World Is Not Enough Michael Apted 1999 Action / James Bond

James Bond: Mama said Renard is ornery cause he's got all them teeth and no toothbrush. Dr. Molly Warmflash: Renard is agressive because of a bullet lodged in his medulla oblongata. It's the sector of the brain that controls the aggressive behavior.  M: That is correct! The medulla oblongata! James Bond: —but mama say that— M: The medulla…oblongata!

Reviewed on Sunday, December 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

Michael Apted - The World Is Not Enough - Action / James Bond - 1999 - James Bond: Mama said Renard is ornery cause he's got all them teeth and no toothbrush. Dr. Molly Warmflash: Renard is agressive because of a bullet lodged in his medulla oblongata. It's the sector of the brain that controls the aggressive behavior.  M: That is correct! The medulla oblongata! James Bond: —but mama say that— M: The medulla…oblongata!
movie
7
Tomorrow Never Dies Roger Spottiswoode 1997 Action / James Bond

Jonathan Pryce a little too human to be believable as Zuckerberg, and they inexplicably only got one Winklevoss twin, but The Social Network was still really fun.

Reviewed on Sunday, December 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Roger Spottiswoode - Tomorrow Never Dies - Action / James Bond - 1997 - Jonathan Pryce a little too human to be believable as Zuckerberg, and they inexplicably only got one Winklevoss twin, but The Social Network was still really fun.
movie
10
GoldenEye Martin Campbell 1995 Action / James Bond

Felix Leiter, upon seeing Alec Trevelyan: “The summer me.”

Reviewed on Tuesday, December 7th, 2021, 12:00am.

Martin Campbell - GoldenEye - Action / James Bond - 1995 - Felix Leiter, upon seeing Alec Trevelyan: “The summer me.”
movie
8
The Living Daylights John Glen 1987 Action / James Bond

The Bond film in which the character must reconcile with all of the penis damage done by Roger Moore's version.

Reviewed on Monday, December 6th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Glen - The Living Daylights - Action / James Bond - 1987 - The Bond film in which the character must reconcile with all of the penis damage done by Roger Moore's version.
movie
10
Licence to Kill John Glen 1989 Action / James Bond

I am not yet sure what it means, but it is an incredibly important character detail that Bond's unemployed drink of choice is Bud with lime.

Reviewed on Monday, December 6th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Glen - Licence to Kill - Action / James Bond - 1989 - I am not yet sure what it means, but it is an incredibly important character detail that Bond's unemployed drink of choice is Bud with lime.
movie
5
Octopussy John Glen 1983 Action / James Bond

The dirtiest these Bond movies have ever done Americans is making the U.S. Army general lose his shit over the circus.

Reviewed on Sunday, December 5th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Glen - Octopussy - Action / James Bond - 1983 - The dirtiest these Bond movies have ever done Americans is making the U.S. Army general lose his shit over the circus.
movie
8
A View to a Kill John Glen 1985 Action / James Bond

A boy never forgets his first thong.

Reviewed on Sunday, December 5th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Glen - A View to a Kill - Action / James Bond - 1985 - A boy never forgets his first thong.
movie
9
For Your Eyes Only John Glen 1981 Action / James Bond

Me: “After Moonraker, it's kind of nice to get a more grounded film where I'm not constantly having to suspend disbel—“ Roger Moore scales a mountain “—ief.”

Reviewed on Friday, December 3rd, 2021, 12:00am.

John Glen - For Your Eyes Only - Action / James Bond - 1981 - Me: “After Moonraker, it's kind of nice to get a more grounded film where I'm not constantly having to suspend disbel—“ Roger Moore scales a mountain “—ief.”
movie
8
Moonraker Lewis Gilbert 1979 Action / James Bond

Basically the Bond movie that Kanye West would make. My Broccoli Dark Twisted Fantasy.

Reviewed on Thursday, December 2nd, 2021, 12:00am.

Lewis Gilbert - Moonraker - Action / James Bond - 1979 - Basically the Bond movie that Kanye West would make. My Broccoli Dark Twisted Fantasy.
movie
8
The Spy Who Loved Me Lewis Gilbert 1977 Action / James Bond

It took them three films to unlock the secret to making Roger Moore seem athletic: Jaws.

Reviewed on Wednesday, December 1st, 2021, 12:00am.

Lewis Gilbert - The Spy Who Loved Me - Action / James Bond - 1977 - It took them three films to unlock the secret to making Roger Moore seem athletic: Jaws.
movie
6
Live and Let Die Guy Hamilton 1973 Action / James Bond

All-time kill-quip combo.

Reviewed on Monday, November 29th, 2021, 12:00am.

Guy Hamilton - Live and Let Die - Action / James Bond - 1973 - All-time kill-quip combo.
movie
5
The Man with the Golden Gun Guy Hamilton 1974 Action / James Bond

Somewhere in the multiverse, Nick Nack has James Bond's head on the end of his trident.

Reviewed on Monday, November 29th, 2021, 12:00am.

Guy Hamilton - The Man with the Golden Gun - Action / James Bond - 1974 - Somewhere in the multiverse, Nick Nack has James Bond's head on the end of his trident.
movie
10
You Only Live Twice Lewis Gilbert 1967 Action / James Bond

The definition of 'developing fast reflex actions' and 'spiritual strength' is me mashing the 10 as soon as I am shown a ninja training school in a Bond movie. Now they immediately make me question those reflexes when they…transform…Bond, but I gotta go with my gut.

Reviewed on Sunday, November 28th, 2021, 12:00am.

Lewis Gilbert - You Only Live Twice - Action / James Bond - 1967 - The definition of 'developing fast reflex actions' and 'spiritual strength' is me mashing the 10 as soon as I am shown a ninja training school in a Bond movie. Now they immediately make me question those reflexes when they…transform…Bond, but I gotta go with my gut.
movie
10
On Her Majesty's Secret Service Peter R. Hunt 1969 Action / James Bond

Nightskiing Deserves a fire fight

Reviewed on Sunday, November 28th, 2021, 12:00am.

Peter R. Hunt - On Her Majesty's Secret Service - Action / James Bond - 1969 - Nightskiing Deserves a fire fight
movie
7
Diamonds Are Forever Guy Hamilton 1971 Action / James Bond

Smartly set in Vegas, where we can finally get a touch of realism to a Bond movie, as it shows how 99% of people are unattractive.

Reviewed on Sunday, November 28th, 2021, 12:00am.

Guy Hamilton - Diamonds Are Forever - Action / James Bond - 1971 - Smartly set in Vegas, where we can finally get a touch of realism to a Bond movie, as it shows how 99% of people are unattractive.
movie
10
Thunderball Terence Young 1965 Action / James Bond

I'm a simple man. You give me a pre-opening credits jetpack escape, your film gets a 10. Then you give me Bond looking like a more scantily-clad Britney in “Oops I Did It Again” in a harpoon fight climax? Why did people even try to make films after this?

Reviewed on Saturday, November 27th, 2021, 12:00am.

Terence Young - Thunderball - Action / James Bond - 1965 - I'm a simple man. You give me a pre-opening credits jetpack escape, your film gets a 10. Then you give me Bond looking like a more scantily-clad Britney in “Oops I Did It Again” in a harpoon fight climax? Why did people even try to make films after this?
movie
7
Dr. No Terence Young 1962 Action / James Bond

I don't think any exchange can better serve as thesis for this franchise than: BOND: It's throwing the gyroscopic controls of a guided missile off-balance with a radio beam or something, isn't it? M: More or less.

Reviewed on Friday, November 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

Terence Young - Dr. No - Action / James Bond - 1962 - I don't think any exchange can better serve as thesis for this franchise than: BOND: It's throwing the gyroscopic controls of a guided missile off-balance with a radio beam or something, isn't it? M: More or less.
movie
10
From Russia with Love Terence Young 1963 Action / James Bond

This silken blonde baddy really ditched getting lathered with sunscreen at the lakeside villain boot camp to go die on a train. It really makes you wonder what it's all for.

Reviewed on Friday, November 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

Terence Young - From Russia with Love - Action / James Bond - 1963 - This silken blonde baddy really ditched getting lathered with sunscreen at the lakeside villain boot camp to go die on a train. It really makes you wonder what it's all for.
movie
10
Goldfinger Guy Hamilton 1964 Action / James Bond

James Bond had no idea, as he was tearing up Miami Beach in a romper, of the groundwork he was laying for dudes at Ultra Music Festival decades later.

Reviewed on Friday, November 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

Guy Hamilton - Goldfinger - Action / James Bond - 1964 - James Bond had no idea, as he was tearing up Miami Beach in a romper, of the groundwork he was laying for dudes at Ultra Music Festival decades later.
movie
8
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery Jay Roach 1997 Comedy

Rivers Cuomo versus Michael Stipe

Reviewed on Friday, November 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jay Roach - Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery - Comedy - 1997 - Rivers Cuomo versus Michael Stipe
movie
5
Last Night in Soho Edgar Wright 2021 Horror

$400 jacket? Fashion school students get PAID.

Reviewed on Sunday, November 21st, 2021, 12:00am.

Edgar Wright - Last Night in Soho - Horror - 2021 - $400 jacket? Fashion school students get PAID.
movie
8
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Shane Black 2005 Comedy / Action

The most 2004 film of 2005.

Reviewed on Monday, November 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Shane Black - Kiss Kiss Bang Bang - Comedy / Action - 2005 - The most 2004 film of 2005.
movie
10
Dune Denis Villeneuve 2021 Action / Science Fiction

Rabban: now there's a spicy meatball!

Reviewed on Monday, November 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Denis Villeneuve - Dune - Action / Science Fiction - 2021 - Rabban: now there's a spicy meatball!
movie
7
The Night of the Hunter Charles Laughton 1955 Drama

Sodom of the Ohio River' is such a great name for Cincinnati.

Reviewed on Friday, November 5th, 2021, 12:00am.

Charles Laughton - The Night of the Hunter - Drama - 1955 - Sodom of the Ohio River' is such a great name for Cincinnati.
movie
8
Wait Until Dark Terence Young 1967 Drama

The collectibles market has really gotten out of hand.

Reviewed on Thursday, November 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Terence Young - Wait Until Dark - Drama - 1967 - The collectibles market has really gotten out of hand.
movie
8
Psycho Goreman Steven Kostanski 2020 Horror / Comedy

Never underestimate the power of a sister.

Reviewed on Monday, November 1st, 2021, 12:00am.

Steven Kostanski - Psycho Goreman - Horror / Comedy - 2020 - Never underestimate the power of a sister.
movie
8
Bubba Ho-tep Don Coscarelli 2002 Comedy / Horror

“Let's get decadent” is going to get so much play at our house before snack time.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 30th, 2021, 12:00am.

Don Coscarelli - Bubba Ho-tep - Comedy / Horror - 2002 - “Let's get decadent” is going to get so much play at our house before snack time.
movie
6
Ghost Ship Steve Beck 2002 Horror

This one has gotta be in the 95th percentile of things going right for a Carnival Cruise.

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 26th, 2021, 12:00am.

Steve Beck - Ghost Ship - Horror - 2002 - This one has gotta be in the 95th percentile of things going right for a Carnival Cruise.
movie
10
The Bride of Frankenstein James Whale 1935 Horror

Fell in love with the girl at the rock throw

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

James Whale - The Bride of Frankenstein - Horror - 1935 - Fell in love with the girl at the rock throw
movie
4
Practical Magic Griffin Dunne 1998 Comedy

Maybe my perception of time was off in this movie but it seemed like Sally's husband's body wasn't even cold yet before these events unfolded.

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Griffin Dunne - Practical Magic - Comedy - 1998 - Maybe my perception of time was off in this movie but it seemed like Sally's husband's body wasn't even cold yet before these events unfolded.
movie
10
The Devil's Rejects Rob Zombie 2005 Horror

If a Von Dutch hat was a movie.

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Rob Zombie - The Devil's Rejects - Horror - 2005 - If a Von Dutch hat was a movie.
movie
7
Clue Jonathan Lynn 1985 Comedy / Horror

Tim Curry puts the ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody in Mr. Boddy-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody.

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jonathan Lynn - Clue - Comedy / Horror - 1985 - Tim Curry puts the ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody in Mr. Boddy-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody-ody.
movie
8
Creature from the Black Lagoon Jack Arnold 1954 Horror

Well yeah, after seeing this, it's no wonder Ryan Lochte is the way that he is. We have no one to blame but ourselves.

Reviewed on Monday, October 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jack Arnold - Creature from the Black Lagoon - Horror - 1954 - Well yeah, after seeing this, it's no wonder Ryan Lochte is the way that he is. We have no one to blame but ourselves.
movie
4
The Haunting Jan de Bont 1999 Horror

Anti-gargoyle propaganda.

Reviewed on Sunday, October 24th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jan de Bont - The Haunting - Horror - 1999 - Anti-gargoyle propaganda.
movie
8
Hellbound: Hellraiser II Tony Randel 1988 Horror

I'm just gonna say it: the puzzle doesn't look that hard.

Reviewed on Sunday, October 24th, 2021, 12:00am.

Tony Randel - Hellbound: Hellraiser II - Horror - 1988 - I'm just gonna say it: the puzzle doesn't look that hard.
movie
10
Frankenstein James Whale 1931 Horror

Wait is Burger Master still a title to attain? I assume not because my phone hasn't made a peep, but just making sure.

Reviewed on Sunday, October 24th, 2021, 12:00am.

James Whale - Frankenstein - Horror - 1931 - Wait is Burger Master still a title to attain? I assume not because my phone hasn't made a peep, but just making sure.
movie
6
The Monster Squad Fred Dekker 1987 Horror / Comedy

I don't know it took me three days to watch through no fault of its own but I liked the part with the lasers and virgins, reminded me of a Tool concert.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 23rd, 2021, 12:00am.

Fred Dekker - The Monster Squad - Horror / Comedy - 1987 - I don't know it took me three days to watch through no fault of its own but I liked the part with the lasers and virgins, reminded me of a Tool concert.
movie
6
House of Wax Jaume Collet-Serra 2005 Horror

What even is wax?

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jaume Collet-Serra - House of Wax - Horror - 2005 - What even is wax?
movie
5
House on Haunted Hill William Malone 1999 Horror

Still better than almost every party I've been to as an adult.

Reviewed on Monday, October 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

William Malone - House on Haunted Hill - Horror - 1999 - Still better than almost every party I've been to as an adult.
movie
7
Thir13en Ghosts Steve Beck 2001 Horror

Interior decorating in the 90s was something else.

Reviewed on Monday, October 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

Steve Beck - Thir13en Ghosts - Horror - 2001 - Interior decorating in the 90s was something else.
movie
9
Re-Animator Stuart Gordon 1985 Horror

Need some of that reagent to conquer the brain death of watching 31 movies in October.

Reviewed on Monday, October 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

Stuart Gordon - Re-Animator - Horror - 1985 - Need some of that reagent to conquer the brain death of watching 31 movies in October.
movie
6
Jeepers Creepers Victor Salva 2001 Horror

Pretty similar vibes to when I say, “Hey check this song out.”

Reviewed on Sunday, October 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

Victor Salva - Jeepers Creepers - Horror - 2001 - Pretty similar vibes to when I say, “Hey check this song out.”
movie
7
Funny Games Michael Haneke 2007 Horror

Never trust youths who like golf.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Michael Haneke - Funny Games - Horror - 2007 - Never trust youths who like golf.
movie
7
Halloween Kills David Gordon Green 2021 Horror

This level of continuity quite frankly makes me uncomfortable.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

David Gordon Green - Halloween Kills - Horror - 2021 - This level of continuity quite frankly makes me uncomfortable.
movie
7
Child's Play Tom Holland 1988 Horror

It really seems like Charles Lee Ray was meant to be a doll, you know? Not everyone finds themselves in life, so it's really nice to see.

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Tom Holland - Child's Play - Horror - 1988 - It really seems like Charles Lee Ray was meant to be a doll, you know? Not everyone finds themselves in life, so it's really nice to see.
movie
7
Final Destination James Wong 2000 Horror

Honestly, Billy, the way you died without seeing the Jets win the Super Bowl is so much better than the way the rest of the class of 2000 will die without seeing the Jets win a Super Bowl.

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

James Wong - Final Destination - Horror - 2000 - Honestly, Billy, the way you died without seeing the Jets win the Super Bowl is so much better than the way the rest of the class of 2000 will die without seeing the Jets win a Super Bowl.
movie
6
Happy Death Day Christopher Landon 2017 Horror

My family drags our birthdays like this too, girl.

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Christopher Landon - Happy Death Day - Horror - 2017 - My family drags our birthdays like this too, girl.
movie
8
Slither James Gunn 2006 Horror / Comedy

Enjoy Slurm

Reviewed on Friday, October 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

James Gunn - Slither - Horror / Comedy - 2006 - Enjoy Slurm
movie
4
Escape Room Adam Robitel 2019 Horror

What's your escape room? Mine's an important stack of mail I have to read to find the clues.

Reviewed on Thursday, October 14th, 2021, 12:00am.

Adam Robitel - Escape Room - Horror - 2019 - What's your escape room? Mine's an important stack of mail I have to read to find the clues.
movie
2
The Town That Dreaded Sundown Charles B. Pierce 1976 Horror

This Three Stooges police work made it safe for me to buy wrestling figures at the Texarkana mall many years later.

Reviewed on Thursday, October 14th, 2021, 12:00am.

Charles B. Pierce - The Town That Dreaded Sundown - Horror - 1976 - This Three Stooges police work made it safe for me to buy wrestling figures at the Texarkana mall many years later.
movie
8
The Raven Lew Landers 1935 Horror

Basically my house but with '90s memorabilia instead of torture devices.

Reviewed on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021, 12:00am.

Lew Landers - The Raven - Horror - 1935 - Basically my house but with '90s memorabilia instead of torture devices.
movie
8
Pet Sematary Mary Lambert 1989 Horror

I'm gonna cuddle my cats so hard they'll run the next time they hear the score of this movie.

Reviewed on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021, 12:00am.

Mary Lambert - Pet Sematary - Horror - 1989 - I'm gonna cuddle my cats so hard they'll run the next time they hear the score of this movie.
movie
7
Ready or Not Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett 2019 Horror

Pretty standard game night vibes.

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett - Ready or Not - Horror - 2019 - Pretty standard game night vibes.
movie
2
Knock Knock Eli Roth 2015 Horror

The way this dude handled his records and the fact that he had spare robes, gotta say he had it coming.

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Eli Roth - Knock Knock - Horror - 2015 - The way this dude handled his records and the fact that he had spare robes, gotta say he had it coming.
movie
8
The Fog John Carpenter 1980 Horror

Where is KoЯn when you need them?

Reviewed on Monday, October 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Carpenter - The Fog - Horror - 1980 - Where is KoЯn when you need them?
movie
5
Lake Mungo Joel Anderson 2008 Horror

The title and accents led me to believe this would be a good bit funnier than it was.

Reviewed on Monday, October 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Joel Anderson - Lake Mungo - Horror - 2008 - The title and accents led me to believe this would be a good bit funnier than it was.
movie
7
Sinister Scott Derrickson 2012 Horror

Ann Rule would never.

Reviewed on Monday, October 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Scott Derrickson - Sinister - Horror - 2012 - Ann Rule would never.
movie
6
When a Stranger Calls Fred Walton 1979 Horror

2021 remake: SCAM LIKELY

Reviewed on Monday, October 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Fred Walton - When a Stranger Calls - Horror - 1979 - 2021 remake: SCAM LIKELY
movie
6
Fear Street: 1666 Leigh Janiak 2021 Horror

Well-outlines the dangers of popping a party boner.

Reviewed on Sunday, October 10th, 2021, 12:00am.

Leigh Janiak - Fear Street: 1666 - Horror - 2021 - Well-outlines the dangers of popping a party boner.
movie
7
Club Dread Jay Chandrasekhar 2004 Comedy / Horror

God that Coconut Pete/Eddie Money/Billy Squier tour would have been legendary.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 9th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jay Chandrasekhar - Club Dread - Comedy / Horror - 2004 - God that Coconut Pete/Eddie Money/Billy Squier tour would have been legendary.
movie
7
Fear Street: 1978 Leigh Janiak 2021 Horror

Taking so many notes on what I want done with my bones when I die.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 9th, 2021, 12:00am.

Leigh Janiak - Fear Street: 1978 - Horror - 2021 - Taking so many notes on what I want done with my bones when I die.
movie
6
Fear Street: 1994 Leigh Janiak 2021 Horror

Little man crushing AOL chat rooms and Iron Maiden got me right in the heart.

Reviewed on Friday, October 8th, 2021, 12:00am.

Leigh Janiak - Fear Street: 1994 - Horror - 2021 - Little man crushing AOL chat rooms and Iron Maiden got me right in the heart.
movie
8
Sisters Brian De Palma 1972 Horror

I hate when people know it's my birthday, too.

Reviewed on Thursday, October 7th, 2021, 12:00am.

Brian De Palma - Sisters - Horror - 1972 - I hate when people know it's my birthday, too.
movie
7
The 'Burbs Joe Dante 1989 Horror / Comedy

I am getting so many ideas for my upcoming week off.

Reviewed on Thursday, October 7th, 2021, 12:00am.

Joe Dante - The 'Burbs - Horror / Comedy - 1989 - I am getting so many ideas for my upcoming week off.
movie
10
Shadow of a Doubt Alfred Hitchcock 1943 Drama

Little Roger grew up to host Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction.

Reviewed on Wednesday, October 6th, 2021, 12:00am.

Alfred Hitchcock - Shadow of a Doubt - Drama - 1943 - Little Roger grew up to host Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction.
movie
10
Videodrome David Cronenberg 1983 Horror

That's how I used to watch my Homeward Bound tape.

Reviewed on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021, 12:00am.

David Cronenberg - Videodrome - Horror - 1983 - That's how I used to watch my Homeward Bound tape.
movie
5
The Craft Andrew Fleming 1996 Horror

My heart wasn't ready for a heel Breckin Meyer.

Reviewed on Monday, October 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Andrew Fleming - The Craft - Horror - 1996 - My heart wasn't ready for a heel Breckin Meyer.
movie
10
Scream Wes Craven 1996 Horror

The original “oh you like Radiohead? Name five songs” guy.

Reviewed on Monday, October 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Wes Craven - Scream - Horror - 1996 - The original “oh you like Radiohead? Name five songs” guy.
movie
10
Black Christmas Bob Clark 1974 Horror

This is the type of film that really shows how far we've come. A 'call is coming from inside the house' reveal is blowing minds in '74 and now we're texting our spouses from bed when they're in the kitchen to get us some candy.

Reviewed on Monday, October 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Bob Clark - Black Christmas - Horror - 1974 - This is the type of film that really shows how far we've come. A 'call is coming from inside the house' reveal is blowing minds in '74 and now we're texting our spouses from bed when they're in the kitchen to get us some candy.
movie
7
Idle Hands Rodman Flender 1999 Horror

If Sublime is playing in heaven, the world better watch out for me.

Reviewed on Monday, October 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Rodman Flender - Idle Hands - Horror - 1999 - If Sublime is playing in heaven, the world better watch out for me.
movie
10
Psycho Alfred Hitchcock 1960 Horror

Well, it beats Arizona.

Reviewed on Monday, October 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Alfred Hitchcock - Psycho - Horror - 1960 - Well, it beats Arizona.
movie
8
Candyman Bernard Rose 1992 Horror

Some of the parts were just too unbelievable for me. People reading an academic paper? Come on.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 2nd, 2021, 12:00am.

Bernard Rose - Candyman - Horror - 1992 - Some of the parts were just too unbelievable for me. People reading an academic paper? Come on.
movie
10
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre Tobe Hooper 1974 Horror

A masterclass in home defense. Kevin McAllister, eat your heart out.

Reviewed on Saturday, October 2nd, 2021, 12:00am.

Tobe Hooper - The Texas Chain Saw Massacre - Horror - 1974 - A masterclass in home defense. Kevin McAllister, eat your heart out.
movie
6
Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia Sam Peckinpah 1974 Drama

Henchman wanted. Must look exactly like me for twin maneuvers and maximum interchangeability.

Reviewed on Thursday, September 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Sam Peckinpah - Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia - Drama - 1974 - Henchman wanted. Must look exactly like me for twin maneuvers and maximum interchangeability.
movie
6
F9 Justin Lin 2021 Action / Fast and Furious

Couldn't answer a single question my wife asked me about the plot of the movie I was actively watching, absolute perfection.

Reviewed on Tuesday, August 10th, 2021, 12:00am.

Justin Lin - F9 - Action / Fast and Furious - 2021 - Couldn't answer a single question my wife asked me about the plot of the movie I was actively watching, absolute perfection.
movie
4
Horrible Bosses Seth Gordon 2011 Comedy

It's good to know which ones we can safely leave behind in the past.

Reviewed on Thursday, July 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Seth Gordon - Horrible Bosses - Comedy - 2011 - It's good to know which ones we can safely leave behind in the past.
movie
8
Flash Gordon Mike Hodges 1980 Action / Science Fiction

General Klytus, in Phil Brickma's voice: “HOT. HAIL! YOU HEAT UP…THE ICE CUBES!”

Reviewed on Thursday, July 15th, 2021, 12:00am.

Mike Hodges - Flash Gordon - Action / Science Fiction - 1980 - General Klytus, in Phil Brickma's voice: “HOT. HAIL! YOU HEAT UP…THE ICE CUBES!”
movie
10
Collateral Michael Mann 2004 Drama / Action

Only thing that could've made it better is “Ants Marching” during the coyote scene.

Reviewed on Monday, July 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Michael Mann - Collateral - Drama / Action - 2004 - Only thing that could've made it better is “Ants Marching” during the coyote scene.
movie
7
Never Rarely Sometimes Always Eliza Hittman 2020 Drama

God we are such pieces of shit.

Reviewed on Monday, July 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Eliza Hittman - Never Rarely Sometimes Always - Drama - 2020 - God we are such pieces of shit.
movie
8
Godzilla Gareth Edwards 2014 Action

Screaming at Gareth Edwards reducing Nevada to a nuclear waste dump.

Reviewed on Monday, July 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Gareth Edwards - Godzilla - Action - 2014 - Screaming at Gareth Edwards reducing Nevada to a nuclear waste dump.
movie
7
The Limey Steven Soderbergh 1999 Drama / Action

Could not get over how much Stacy's wig had him looking like Tobias Funke's hair plug phase.

Reviewed on Sunday, July 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Steven Soderbergh - The Limey - Drama / Action - 1999 - Could not get over how much Stacy's wig had him looking like Tobias Funke's hair plug phase.
movie
6
Black Widow Cate Shortland 2021 Action / Super Hero

I need the deleted scene of Rachel Weisz applying that smoky eye.

Reviewed on Sunday, July 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Cate Shortland - Black Widow - Action / Super Hero - 2021 - I need the deleted scene of Rachel Weisz applying that smoky eye.
movie
7
Assault on Precinct 13 John Carpenter 1976 Action

That is one tightly-knit hundreds-deep street gang.

Reviewed on Thursday, July 8th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Carpenter - Assault on Precinct 13 - Action - 1976 - That is one tightly-knit hundreds-deep street gang.
movie
7
Mirror Andrei Tarkovsky 1975 Drama

Didn't understand a lick of it but it sure was nice to look at.

Reviewed on Thursday, July 8th, 2021, 12:00am.

Andrei Tarkovsky - Mirror - Drama - 1975 - Didn't understand a lick of it but it sure was nice to look at.
movie
7
Nomadland Chloé Zhao 2020 Drama

Loved getting to see the source material for the "Widespread Panic!" guy.

Reviewed on Tuesday, June 29th, 2021, 12:00am.

Chloé Zhao - Nomadland - Drama - 2020 - Loved getting to see the source material for the "Widespread Panic!" guy.
movie
4
I'm Thinking of Ending Things Charlie Kaufman 2020 Drama

Hey, so was I!

Reviewed on Sunday, June 27th, 2021, 12:00am.

Charlie Kaufman - I'm Thinking of Ending Things - Drama - 2020 - Hey, so was I!
movie
8
Chungking Express Wong Kar-wai 1994 Drama / Romance

Wait, canned goods expire?

Reviewed on Monday, June 21st, 2021, 12:00am.

Wong Kar-wai - Chungking Express - Drama / Romance - 1994 - Wait, canned goods expire?
movie
8
Hard Boiled John Woo 1992 Action

Dead drummer…what a cliché.

Reviewed on Saturday, June 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

John Woo - Hard Boiled - Action - 1992 - Dead drummer…what a cliché.
movie
8
The Wicker Man Robin Hardy 1973 Horror

, or The Biggest Rage Fan at Coachella. 

Reviewed on Sunday, June 13th, 2021, 12:00am.

Robin Hardy - The Wicker Man - Horror - 1973 - , or The Biggest Rage Fan at Coachella. 
movie
6
Streets of Fire Walter Hill 1984 Action / Drama

The wrong man won.

Reviewed on Saturday, June 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Walter Hill - Streets of Fire - Action / Drama - 1984 - The wrong man won.
movie
8
Tenet Christopher Nolan 2020 Action / Science Fiction

Tag yourself: I'm Elizabeth Debicki in a fevered deathstate strapped to a gurney while Robert Pattinson tries to explain the plot to me.

Reviewed on Tuesday, June 8th, 2021, 12:00am.

Christopher Nolan - Tenet - Action / Science Fiction - 2020 - Tag yourself: I'm Elizabeth Debicki in a fevered deathstate strapped to a gurney while Robert Pattinson tries to explain the plot to me.
movie
8
The Lady from Shanghai Orson Welles 1947 Drama

The Life Aquatic with Steve Buscemi

Reviewed on Sunday, June 6th, 2021, 12:00am.

Orson Welles - The Lady from Shanghai - Drama - 1947 - The Life Aquatic with Steve Buscemi
movie
7
The Wolf Man George Waggner 1941 Horror

A little too much suspension of disbelief to buy Lon Chaney as a) an attractive man and b) Claude Rains' child, but once the wolf stuff starts it snaps into focus.

Reviewed on Wednesday, June 2nd, 2021, 12:00am.

George Waggner - The Wolf Man - Horror - 1941 - A little too much suspension of disbelief to buy Lon Chaney as a) an attractive man and b) Claude Rains' child, but once the wolf stuff starts it snaps into focus.
movie
8
The King of Comedy Martin Scorsese 1982 Drama

Still stabler (and funnier) than Joe Rogan.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 30th, 2021, 12:00am.

Martin Scorsese - The King of Comedy - Drama - 1982 - Still stabler (and funnier) than Joe Rogan.
movie
8
Eyes Wide Shut Stanley Kubrick 1999 Drama

The pot was making her aggressive though.

Reviewed on Thursday, May 27th, 2021, 12:00am.

Stanley Kubrick - Eyes Wide Shut - Drama - 1999 - The pot was making her aggressive though.
movie
8
Being There Hal Ashby 1979 Comedy

The energy in that limo when he plays “Basketball Jones” is the exact same as when I blow my aux cord privileges on a twenty-minute “You Enjoy Myself.”

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 25th, 2021, 12:00am.

Hal Ashby - Being There - Comedy - 1979 - The energy in that limo when he plays “Basketball Jones” is the exact same as when I blow my aux cord privileges on a twenty-minute “You Enjoy Myself.”
movie
4
Mortal Kombat Simon McQuoid 2021 Action

Never forget the Outworld blew a 9-0 lead. “Grunt” count in subtitles: 108

Reviewed on Sunday, May 23rd, 2021, 12:00am.

Simon McQuoid - Mortal Kombat - Action - 2021 - Never forget the Outworld blew a 9-0 lead. “Grunt” count in subtitles: 108
movie
6
Army of the Dead Zack Snyder 2021 Action / Horror

Tig Notaro as Virgil Malloy in Ocean's Fourteen.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 23rd, 2021, 12:00am.

Zack Snyder - Army of the Dead - Action / Horror - 2021 - Tig Notaro as Virgil Malloy in Ocean's Fourteen.
movie
6
Last Action Hero John McTiernan 1993 Action

A young boy with a great mom and a bloodlust for action gets sucked into a movie to escape reality. It's Arnold Schwarzenegger in, My Letterboxd Origin Story. 

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

John McTiernan - Last Action Hero - Action - 1993 - A young boy with a great mom and a bloodlust for action gets sucked into a movie to escape reality. It's Arnold Schwarzenegger in, My Letterboxd Origin Story. 
movie
7
Witchfinder General Michael Reeves 1968 Horror

Kept waiting for Satan's music to hit.

Reviewed on Monday, May 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

Michael Reeves - Witchfinder General - Horror - 1968 - Kept waiting for Satan's music to hit.
movie
9
The Host Bong Joon-ho 2006 Horror

Even without a virus, the mutant river squid didn't once yell at a Wal-Mart cashier about its rights. Best subtitle summation of the film: [ALL SLURPING]

Reviewed on Monday, May 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

Bong Joon-ho - The Host - Horror - 2006 - Even without a virus, the mutant river squid didn't once yell at a Wal-Mart cashier about its rights. Best subtitle summation of the film: [ALL SLURPING]
movie
7
Nobody Ilya Naishuller 2021 Action

Honestly, by the end, I didn't even miss Starsky.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Ilya Naishuller - Nobody - Action - 2021 - Honestly, by the end, I didn't even miss Starsky.
movie
8
Another Round Thomas Vinterberg 2020 Comedy / Drama

Dasani commercials have gotten really good.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Thomas Vinterberg - Another Round - Comedy / Drama - 2020 - Dasani commercials have gotten really good.
movie
9
Hellraiser Clive Barker 1987 Horror

The puzzle cube I got at the Dothan, Alabama Cracker Barrel did the exact same thing to me and ruined a perfectly nice trip to Destin.

Reviewed on Friday, May 14th, 2021, 12:00am.

Clive Barker - Hellraiser - Horror - 1987 - The puzzle cube I got at the Dothan, Alabama Cracker Barrel did the exact same thing to me and ruined a perfectly nice trip to Destin.
movie
6
House of 1000 Corpses Rob Zombie 2003 Horror

I counted way less than that.

Reviewed on Friday, May 14th, 2021, 12:00am.

Rob Zombie - House of 1000 Corpses - Horror - 2003 - I counted way less than that.
movie
7
Scanners David Cronenberg 1981 Horror

I feel bad for wardrobe; these guys must have scanned all over every pair of pants they had.

Reviewed on Thursday, May 13th, 2021, 12:00am.

David Cronenberg - Scanners - Horror - 1981 - I feel bad for wardrobe; these guys must have scanned all over every pair of pants they had.
movie
9
Paris, Texas Wim Wenders 1984 Drama

Made me want, in equal measure, a child and a Dr. Pepper.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 12th, 2021, 12:00am.

Wim Wenders - Paris, Texas - Drama - 1984 - Made me want, in equal measure, a child and a Dr. Pepper.
movie
10
Rosemary's Baby Roman Polanski 1968 Horror

Loved the scene where the Castevets dressed up like different De Niro characters.

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 11th, 2021, 12:00am.

Roman Polanski - Rosemary's Baby - Horror - 1968 - Loved the scene where the Castevets dressed up like different De Niro characters.
movie
8
Black Sunday Mario Bava 1960 Horror

Going to remember this the next time I need a way to get out of attending a conference.

Reviewed on Monday, May 10th, 2021, 12:00am.

Mario Bava - Black Sunday - Horror - 1960 - Going to remember this the next time I need a way to get out of attending a conference.
movie
6
Down by Law Jim Jarmusch 1986 Drama / Comedy

O color, where art thou?

Reviewed on Sunday, May 9th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jim Jarmusch - Down by Law - Drama / Comedy - 1986 - O color, where art thou?
movie
7
After Hours Martin Scorsese 1985 Comedy

Imagine moving to a new apartment and finding out there's another papier-mâché sculptress across the street.

Reviewed on Friday, May 7th, 2021, 12:00am.

Martin Scorsese - After Hours - Comedy - 1985 - Imagine moving to a new apartment and finding out there's another papier-mâché sculptress across the street.
movie
8
Possessor Brandon Cronenberg 2020 Horror

Vos could have gotten a bowl of salvia for, like, ten times less money than one of those machines and it would have been only nine times less pleasant.

Reviewed on Thursday, May 6th, 2021, 12:00am.

Brandon Cronenberg - Possessor - Horror - 2020 - Vos could have gotten a bowl of salvia for, like, ten times less money than one of those machines and it would have been only nine times less pleasant.
movie
6
Holy Motors Leos Carax 2012 Drama

Tag yourself; I'm either the photographer gleefully exclaiming, “He's so weird,” or the dude vibing hard on the accordion.

Reviewed on Wednesday, May 5th, 2021, 12:00am.

Leos Carax - Holy Motors - Drama - 2012 - Tag yourself; I'm either the photographer gleefully exclaiming, “He's so weird,” or the dude vibing hard on the accordion.
movie
9
Soul Pete Docter 2020 Comedy / Animation

One of those movies I'll think about often as I do all the same things the movie made me commit to myself that I'd stop doing.

Reviewed on Tuesday, May 4th, 2021, 12:00am.

Pete Docter - Soul - Comedy / Animation - 2020 - One of those movies I'll think about often as I do all the same things the movie made me commit to myself that I'd stop doing.
movie
10
Jurassic Park Steven Spielberg 1993 Action

Once the raptors show up, it's really just time to pick which two of your cats to cast in their roles. Favorite subtitle: (MOOING IN FEAR)

Reviewed on Monday, May 3rd, 2021, 12:00am.

Steven Spielberg - Jurassic Park - Action - 1993 - Once the raptors show up, it's really just time to pick which two of your cats to cast in their roles. Favorite subtitle: (MOOING IN FEAR)
movie
10
Suspiria Dario Argento 1977 Horror

Neon light pouring through the windows? Horrific snoring? Ominous indoor pool? Bugs falling from the ceiling? A boy with bowl cut PTSD? I see Argento also spent some time with his dad in Holiday Inns after his parents split up.

Reviewed on Monday, May 3rd, 2021, 12:00am.

Dario Argento - Suspiria - Horror - 1977 - Neon light pouring through the windows? Horrific snoring? Ominous indoor pool? Bugs falling from the ceiling? A boy with bowl cut PTSD? I see Argento also spent some time with his dad in Holiday Inns after his parents split up.
movie
7
The Killing of a Chinese Bookie John Cassavetes 1976 Drama

Look, I don't mean to victim blame, but I think Cosmo could have paid that debt much easier if he'd fired his musical director and got a jukebox with some ZZ Top on it or something.

Reviewed on Sunday, May 2nd, 2021, 12:00am.

John Cassavetes - The Killing of a Chinese Bookie - Drama - 1976 - Look, I don't mean to victim blame, but I think Cosmo could have paid that debt much easier if he'd fired his musical director and got a jukebox with some ZZ Top on it or something.
movie
7
Police Story Jackie Chan 1985 Action / Martial Arts

Almost every star the movie loses with a too-long, plot-heavy middle and with asking me to trust men to capably handle firearms who are that bad at darts is recovered by all the villains taking Mick Foley-like bumps through glass tables in the climax.

Reviewed on Saturday, May 1st, 2021, 12:00am.

Jackie Chan - Police Story - Action / Martial Arts - 1985 - Almost every star the movie loses with a too-long, plot-heavy middle and with asking me to trust men to capably handle firearms who are that bad at darts is recovered by all the villains taking Mick Foley-like bumps through glass tables in the climax.
movie
8
City Lights Charlie Chaplin 1931 Comedy

A very educational viewing in which I learned the extent to which Vince McMahon owes Charlie Chaplin for his success and that jockeys evolved from boxers.

Reviewed on Monday, April 19th, 2021, 12:00am.

Charlie Chaplin - City Lights - Comedy - 1931 - A very educational viewing in which I learned the extent to which Vince McMahon owes Charlie Chaplin for his success and that jockeys evolved from boxers.
movie
7
Napoleon Dynamite Jared Hess 2004 Comedy

Odds are good that if you sort by Hot on /r/streetwear, you will find at least one of Napoleon's fits.

Reviewed on Sunday, April 18th, 2021, 12:00am.

Jared Hess - Napoleon Dynamite - Comedy - 2004 - Odds are good that if you sort by Hot on /r/streetwear, you will find at least one of Napoleon's fits.
movie
7
Frenzy Alfred Hitchcock 1972 Drama

Great right up to the point when they disparage margaritas.

Reviewed on Saturday, April 17th, 2021, 12:00am.

Alfred Hitchcock - Frenzy - Drama - 1972 - Great right up to the point when they disparage margaritas.
movie
5
Legend Ridley Scott 1985 Action / Fantasy

Excellent Mirror Shield work by Link. Looks fabulous in his Molly Tunic as well. Director's Cut

Reviewed on Friday, April 16th, 2021, 12:00am.

Ridley Scott - Legend - Action / Fantasy - 1985 - Excellent Mirror Shield work by Link. Looks fabulous in his Molly Tunic as well. Director's Cut
movie
8
Thief Michael Mann 1981 Drama

Easily a top three '80s German electronic music video with heavy power tool erotic visual themes.

Reviewed on Friday, April 9th, 2021, 12:00am.

Michael Mann - Thief - Drama - 1981 - Easily a top three '80s German electronic music video with heavy power tool erotic visual themes.